Lessons

In preparation for upcoming conversations, I am compiling a list of lessons I learned growing up which I don't want to pass on.


I will call for aid and no help will come. I must do it all myself.

Being loved hurts.

Church is all my social life, all the safe people in the world, and my entire pool of friends. A church circumscribes the boundaries of my life.

Family means loyalty at all costs and acceptance of all treatment from family members no matter how painful. Being with family is a duty. Without family there is only abandonment.

Parents, and sometimes other family members, know me better than I know myself. Therefore, in any disagreement, those who know better are always right.

There are consistent losers in the family structure. The losers should muster up their loyalty and duty because that's what others did when they were the losers.

Forgiveness means making peace without truth.

Conflict and anger means the end of relationship. Therefore, conflict must be avoided at all costs. This is as good as it gets so hang on to it.

The only people I can trust and count on are family and church. I must accept all treatment from those who love me.